My Dog, He Is an Ugly Dog

My dog, he is an ugly dog

he's put together wrong

his legs are much too short for him

his ears are much too long



My dog, he is a scrufffy dog

he's missing clumps of hair

his fase is quiet ridiculous

his tail is scarcely there



My dog, he is a dingy dog

his fur is full of fleas

he sometimes smells like dirty socks

he sometimes smells like cheese



My dog, he is a noise dog

he's hardy ever still

he barks at almost anything

his voice is loud and shrill



My dog, he is a stupid dog

his mind is slow and thick

he's never learned to catch a ball

he cannot fetch a stick



My dog, he is a greedy dog

he eats enough for three

his belly bulges to the ground

he is the dog for me